We are taught to hide our less beautiful parts. We hide and stuff down anything that appears not so sweet or good. It is valuable to want to be a good human being, to grow and become better. In doing so though, we have to appreciate and understand we can only get better by noticing what needs improvement. These lesser qualities are not necessarily bad, more like ignorant. Unknowing, ignorance doesn't know better. Even if we did know better, we are allowed to feel all things.
More than anything, in all the study and living I have done, accepting and embracing this lesser part of ourselves is the ticket to an enjoyable life. We are so hard on ourselves and hold much against ourselves! It is kind of twisted. We certainly aren't our own best friend. It really doesn't make sense but it is what we do and how we were trained. As we grow we hopefully are inspired to forgive ourselves and others. We are spirits in human bodies. It is not an easy to be "perfect" when you are learning how to be a spirit in a human body.
Perfect means complete anyway. It doesn't mean what we think. It means something is done. To be complete. So all can be perfect, even our negativity. It just needs to be done. We can learn from it. So if we do learn it is complete and was just a lesson. There is only learning truly anyway, We are constantly learning so we are going to do "ignorant" things continually. From our unknowing, we will make miss takes, create issues, be unruly for we are learning. So there need not be this hidden part of ourselves called the shadow. The shadow is just the errors we made in the process.
To embrace and allow yourself to make mistakes, learn and grow is the game here. Allowing ourselves to be imperfect, in complete should be natural. It is a big mistake to not embrace all our experiences. When we do, we don't create shadows of ourselves. We have compassion for ourselves learning and understand we don't always know the best behavior or course of action. We shouldn't be embarrassed by it.
When we do judge ourselves for error we create this shadow that can be quite an issue. We use energy to hide parts of ourselves and this is wasteful. We split off parts of ourselves that are valuable. Our culture encourages us to hide ourselves, create a mask of who we are so we appear appropriate or to fit in some mold. None of us fit into any mold. As we get older we decide we don't care what others think as much for no one fits into the society ideal. Then we begin to reclaim these hidden parts and the energy of them. We learn to forgive ourselves for not being the "norm" and accept ourselves as we are. It is a huge process that I only hope in the future we learn that this "shadow" is not us. It is just ignorant choices that are bound to happen in this experience.
To be our authentic selves we need to reclaim this "shadow" part or ourselves and embrace all who we are, the good and bad. For there really is no bad. It is inexperienced side of ourselves and the small child in us that gets selfish, angry, unruly and out of line. This child like being is full of innovation, power and just part of who we are. Often this part of ourselves is actually supporting us through its behavior trying to protect us, alert us, let us know things are not right. We need to embrace it rather than shun it to the dungeon so to speak.
As I have learned to embrace my unruly shadow, my crazier side, my temper tantrum girl, I realize she is very powerful and full of energy. To have a shadow uses energy to hide parts of yourself from view. She does come out after a bit and create havoc if I don't take time to embrace and understand her. The highest form of enlightenment has to do with making peace with this part of ourselves. For all of us is good. Even our most unruly parts are ok. It is high spirit practice to love all of ourselves and know there is always an area to grow up or refine. When we take this stance and begin to love all of ourselves, our true essential being can emerge.
It does take some effort to forgive ourselves and others. It means we need to let things go and remember we are learning here and will make errors. This doesn't make us bad or messed up. It just is. Loving ourselves through all conditions the magnus opus! When we are mean, selfish, unkind, annoyed, obsessive, offbeat, we are just being human. No one is good all the time, the conditions to challenging here to make the right choices always. We get tired, we get angry, we get impatient, disappointed, unhappy with conditions. These things are ok and often indicate for us to slow down, go inward to know ourselves better, maybe move from conditions, take a break from action. These emotions and annoyances are guidance and indicators to us. When we judge them and pretend they don't exist, we create problems for ourselves and don't listen to the signals these parts of ourselves are telling us.
As you choose to embrace your shadow, you find that these hidden parts of you are actually quite brilliant. They have very valuable information about the world around you. They great gifts and offer learning and refining. They show you parts of yourself that need to maybe reorder and grow up a bit. They are often areas that you misunderstood when you were small and they need some updating. They really aren't bad, they are ignorant, unknown peices of you. I have learned to love my temper tantrum girl. She gives me alerts when I am moving in the wrong direction. If I don't listen to her, she can create more struggle later. She is not always right but she is a piece of me and all pieces of me are valuable.
You start to fall in love with yourself as you claim all your pieces. You see the intricateness of yourself. You see the power you have and how wonderous all parts of you are. We are really magnificent beings with so many parts. It is like a treasure box. There are great gems in your shadow. The power we have to really protect ourselves, support ourselves and know really what is going on around us much more brilliant than we realize. All parts of us are truly on our side if we claim them. You actually fall in love with these parts of yourself for you get to understand them. Often when we were small these behaviors saved and protected us. It is quite fascinating to take a look from experienced eyes.
I invite you to discover yourself on a deeper level by being your own best friend. All pieces are so cool of yourself. Even your shadow. At first it seems undaunting for you have judged yourself so harshly. Once you get over reprimanding yourself to really see what is going on inside, it becomes a very interesting adventure. You learn to observe yourself and watch how this shadow operates. It becomes a richer journey and you do learn to love these pieces of yourself. It is quite fascinating.
Make peace with yourself and all your parts. It is a fabulous journey here filled with many twists and turns. Use all of your being to navigate this experience. Forgive and forget the past. Understand that we are continually learning and error is the tool of growing. You will find some wonderful hidden pieces within once you embrace all of yourself. Quite a fabulous adventure when you embrace your shadow and use it's power!
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Lyn Hicks’ passion is to awaken others to their true joy through play and relaxation! Mentor, Teacher and Writer on The Feminine Way of living!
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