Victimhood on so many levels is part of being a woman. Even if you are not feeling  the victim, there are many woman across the globe in this challenge.  The opposite or cure to this victim energy is mothering. Being the mother to yourself. Taking care of yourself fully on all levels. The Divine Feminine. The mothering of your femininity.

 I realize part of the path for woman is to sacrifice  for a collaboration in family or  career. We know innately the power of the group and  our maturity to grow into putting ourselves in that group. We, too, get what we want. We are to be factored in. Often, I see woman play the victim here.  After seeing the martyr role for decades, we begin by not including ourselves, our sparkly spirit in creating. It is like this in mothering and at times this is the right choice. As our kids age and we feel unfulfilled, it is now our time to learn to mother ourselves. We birth ourselves as what to be next. Mothering each other as well  supports the release of the victim.

In menopause and peri menopause, we are called to look at our lives, release the anger, unspoken words, times we did not feel honored. As the group leaders we often aquiesce for peace and calm,  this can mistakenly not value our needs,  Our relationships shift. No longer based on loyalty and giving too much or receiving to much.  We together are maturing into a world where we are mothering ourselves so we can feel filled.

I know many things are written on this.  Self care is a buzz word. This has great purpose and why it is everywhere asking us how we do this.  We need to continue to hear and apply this deeper to our lives. Further still, to nourish ourselves and do that first. This seems to go against many beliefs. We keep clearing them for that is why we feel unfulfilled. We are looking in the wrong places for nourishment. We must ground into our bodies  knowing for ourselves what supports it. Emotionally, physically, mentally and spiritually.

Being in a masculine, yang business world, we are evolving to lead with the yin side. The receptive, the openness, the giving to ourselves to feel able in this production world. We give ourselves permission to do what we want. Only we can mother ourselves. Other woman can reflect that to us and support us to transmute the beliefs that we are not allowed to value ourselves first. We say we know this yet do we live this? Are we really our own best friend and using all things in our environment to support us in health, beauty, love, relationship, career, etc.  Are we queen of our dominions?

Do we have friends and others that truly support us? Do we live in healthy ways, appreciating our body, our movement, our food nurturing?  Do we take charge and say no when we don't want to? We are allowed to say "no" if in our heart, it will create problems for us and our well being. This permission, allowance, accepting our needs and filling them by being in charge of all  is in our dominion! How lovely to be queen in our own kingdom! We mother that to be. We are the ones whom claim that. 

I find myself at this time realizing that it is only me and my purpose, path and joy that is in order. My daughter older, I divorced,  a contractor and teacher, I am in full charge. I feel this inside me. It is not  an idea which at others times just a thinking or thought. Clearing that codependency that happens in  marriage and as a mom. Later this is changed  by the  very nature of life. Now I am feeling a grounding into knowing, I create what works best for just me. Even if I was in family or relationship, this is my responsibility. I had not taken that approach fully.

Discerning by listening to yourself first. Not shorting yourself as I often did as the woman of the house. We feel good helping others, it is our nature to do this mothering. Are we mothering ourselves as well as we could? This I am grounding into. This rooted feeling that the earth supports me. I begin there and  support  me above all else. We feel the world, create the group environments and often get overwhelmed by this empathic mothering nature. It all mixes up and we don't really know ourselves. I feel at this time we are grounding into a greater understanding of our power.

We are the mothers of all things,  the masters of this yin energy. Connecting to this truth and grounding  to mother ourselves. Using this energy for others is already occurring. The call to mother ourselves and other woman. For us to collectively give ourselves permission and reflect that to each other. Allowing us to change the paradigm of victim by mothering ourselves and each other. Stepping into the Divine feminine in a clear way that is receiving support from each other and ourselves. 

We learn by knowing ourselves and our emotions. As we learn how we feel and realize these are ours to manage, we mother ourselves. We learn to support and manage others, our environments, and the spaces we are at. We must give and receive, get nourishing and get away from things that don't inspire us to be more of ourselves. Love and understand this me first, then observe the energies from there. Keeping my needs clear and making sure I am in charge of that. Not at the whim of others or waiting.

Our root chakra must be stable. We must feel safe. It is our job to only be in safe places.  Only the things that create safety for us. We sink in and ground this safety to be ourselves more fully. The great mother, the divine feminine takes care of herself then her kingdom. We run the flavor of the world so we must feel good so it all feels good. We can't fake it. Our energy runs our spaces so if we want joy and nourishment, we create this for ourselves. NO other. 

Together we strengthen the mothering of ourselves and thus the world. We support the clearing of the victim archetype. We feel safe if we are mothered, cared for, in safe places. Maybe we weren't but we can mother ourselves to be there now. I like this! I allow this to reorder me. The Great Mother. The Gaia, The Blessed Mary, The Lakshmi, Isis. We are supported by this energy and need to apply it to ourselves. And this self love and nourishing......feels so good!

"The Mother Archetype: Excerpts from Carl Jung
The goddess, and especially the Mother of God, the Virgin, and Sophia. Mythology offers many variations of the mother archetype,  the maiden in the myth of Demeter and Kore; or the mother who is also the beloved, as in the Cybele-Attis myth.
The archetype is often associated with things and places standing for fertility and fruitfulness: the cornucopia, a ploughed field, a garden.

Because of the protection it implies, the magic circle or mandala can be a form of mother archetype.
The qualities associated with it are maternal solicitude and sympathy; the magic authority of the female; the wisdom and spiritual exaltation that transcend reason; any helpful instinct or impulse; all that is benign, all that cherishes and sustains, that fosters growth and fertility.
The place of magic transformation and rebirth, together with the underworld and its inhabitants, are presided over by the mother." The Art Of Being a Woman!

I believe that we all are shining stars! We all have this most delicious spark in us! Prior to Christ they called it the Christos of the heart. Living the path of love has always been revered and why Jesus claimed the loving Christ ideal for us to see!  I so loved that for it is less gender specific, The love of the Blessed Mother. We all have this shining in us somewhere no matter what name we give it.

For me it must be fun and imaginative. I was given a great inner world that comes from this star in side me. I see it as a beautiful twinkle in peoples eyes, light of their smile, the glassy look of tears weld up. I see it everywhere in people and am blessed this is my experience. Seeing the light in others is a magical life!

I inspire that we look for this sparkle in others. It is what love, living love, living in love of life, the eyes of a child are all about. When you seek this most kind expression of others, you find it. It is in all situations and circumstances. Somewhere some thing sparkles at some point. In dark scenes as in fun! If we chose to live in this more and more, we would find the word to appear so different. For it all is a light  perspective. 

Have a fabulous celebration of the Christ birth we have today. See if you too, can birth your twinkle more brightly. It is the call of the season and it is there. The gift, the presence and our present to participate in light ways and share them with others. That is my call and in it I find the Christ, the birth, the Christos, the Blessed Mother light filling my spirit!

Glory be to you today, you shining star!

We are not taught much of death but we have it all around us. In the old days where there was one dying in the other room as one was being born in another. Maybe we had a greater understanding of this circle. Or perhaps being on a farm with animals, seeing this life cycle often made us more comfortable with it. It doesn't have to always be death of a loved one either, death is in all forms. Could be a marriage or other relationship, a job, a way of living, a life cycle. Death and rebirth are all around us really. We still don't have a good relation to it or skills to cope. We need to find new ways to manage this.

Woman's bodies go through this cycle monthly. They are also usually the ones to deal with the situations of death and rebirth in our culture. Our body maybe has an innate wisdom to know what to do and to be there for others in all kinds of death and rebirth. I consider it is part of our nourishing purpose as we are the birthers of life. We can hold in these sad death like situations with comfort and care. Not really having answers to it but just being there with love for others. We want to shy away from this yet we are the ones who find ourselves helping in it. 

I have been in a death cycle for 6 years with the ending of my old life. I lost many friends and my community  from it that has been a great loss. I also supported friends with their mothers dying and at the end of this cycle, my mom passed unexpectly quick. So it seems this gloomy state has been about me for a bit. I had the  recent death yesterday of a woman I cared for part time as she went through her last part of life. It is a bit overwhelming and sad. Sadness we are not so enthused to feel and try to stuff it, shift it quick or pretend it doesn't exist. For me that has not been an option nor do I feel it as a healthy approach. Death, sadness, loss, not getting the things we want are all part of this sense of losing people, places and things. It is part of life and healthier to feel. For it does transmute us.

Blessed I am to really revel and feel my feelings for it is the healthy way to manage through life. With the discomfort we have with death and loss, most don't give it the space. It can create illness and as I have learned, most illness comes from this unprocessing of feelings. They hide inside and create this dark area not dealt with, stagnation per se that can lead to dis ease. So for the last 6 years this gloom has been about me. I have had no choice but to deal with it.

I have discovered that there is also this richness that comes with loss that is very indicating of love. We wouldn't feel so sad if we didn't love things, people and circumstances. So this grief and loss is really just another facet of love.  Heartbreak and sadness is not our favorite expression of love but we only have it if we had love in the first place. Oxytocin, the pleasure hormone of the parasympathetic nervous system is about in grief. The evidence of the love and the washing of the other side of it. We are actually in healing states when we cry, feel sad, miss things or others. This healing hormone is present and supports our body in renewal when we give into the sadness. We are healed and supported as we process our feelings. Not hindered in health.

I have also had much reflection as I finish this death cycle. A review of things comes from loss, grief and death that I wouldn't have do if I hadn't gone through it. Allowing this sadness to come forward brings the juice and gifts of things I loved. I have more compassion for myself and others. I value things differently from this reflection and find greater ease in the changes of life. It has not depressed me or condensed me but expanded my understanding of life and its unexpected shifts. Able to step back and see the good and bad, painful and liberating of the pain by actually just feeling and allowing it. Not getting caught in it but letting it be and move through me.

It also transforms how we see the surface of life. The superficial things that all seem to think matter. When death and loss is about, all those things leave. Hearing someone moan about traffic or another seems so trite. What we really value comes forward and life has a new, deeper meaning to be here. You let go of pieces of your littleness you have for you clearly see how ridiculous it is. You have greater compassion for others for you know not what they may be dealing with underneath. You have a greater connection to life, to being alive and less small thinking about  all of it. 

Judgement leaves too if you process your emotions. At death, all seem like little children. They are helpless often and their childlike nature of hoping their beliefs are true, that they don't really know what is next and even fear of a child seems about. They look so innocent and vulnerable. You can no longer hold anything against them in action or deed for you just have compassion for them as they will soon leave. Our fears of this come forward too and can be seen. Even in situations or things, this judgement can leave. Yes, it is hard to lose anything you wanted. But an acceptance comes in at some point and the whole judgement leaves you. You see more accurately and without all the mess. It is quite innocent and honest. Your feel free and open that it just is how it is and all are doing their best.

Quiet, crying, feeling low all seem fine things to do with this death cycle. I have learned not to bypass it only to find myself losing it at something small. I have learned the art of self care instead of just busying myself. Ironically, when you allow these to come forward, they don't last long like they do when you avoid them. They lie in hiding waiting to bubble up. You don't cry for more than a few minutes I have found and as I stated earlier, it offers healing oxytocin. You get out of fight or flight and actually create renewal. Tears of all situations come out and it really does feel good. We think it won't but it does. You make peace with sadness instead of trying to avoid it. Sadness, loss, are all part of life. No one gets away from it. So it is healthy to be able to process these emotions so energy isn't used to hide it. Greater joy can come in after it is cleared. 

Sacredness to the process of life and death, rebirth has become very clear to me. You can't have new things or experiences without this letting go. There is only so much room in you and you will encounter many little and big losses in life. You don't take it as seriously if you go through it and feel it. It leaves sooner than later. Avoiding it creates alot of stress. Just going through this regular life emotion and processing creates a health and an understanding. All is sacred that is part of life. Your begin to really feel life in it's highs and lows. The highs are more valuable and delicious. The lows just are. We find sacredness to it all.

In being lost, in loss or confusion means that being found or finding your way is just the next progression. If you don't allow being lost, unclear, sad, you won't get to the next leg while you are stuffing it down. All is change and has it's way so you flow with it. Accepting your feelings, acknowledging them allows them to leave and new ways to come it. It is really quite exciting to feel these things for they go and higher joy comes in. Answers, support, clues and messages stream in. It feels quite magical that you can go low only to be lifted by outer sources. Invisible support comes in. It is very mysterious and fun. 

There is a great richness of love that you know when you  feel and process your loss. Life becomes colorful again in a way it never was. You grow and expand your depth and compassion for yourself and others. You find less small things being an issue in life. You seek support from the world in magic ways. You find yourself more ok with all that shows up. You learn to ride the cycle easier. I imagine some incredible greatness will come forth in this next cycle for me. I have learned alot in this death cycle that has inspired and lifted me to new awareness. I understand that love is all that matters in a deeper way. It makes me soften, kinder and more caring. 

I inspire you to find the richness in loss. I have lost many of things, people and dreams in this cycle. I am not depressed or thinking life is not good. I am the opposite. I find simple inspiration that can lift me so high. I find inward comfort that I didn't have before. I am more accepting of all, mostly myself and my ups and downs. I appreciate life more deeply and know how powerful a smile or caring can be. All has great learning and great love in it. I wouldn't know these things without this cycle and the allowance of it to be felt and processed. I encourage all to dive into this for themselves. It is healthy. It is comforting and it can be releasing so new fun and wonder can show up. 

I am enthused for this as it makes all life richer in all ways! Blessings to those in this, for it is like compost and has rich nutrients that you would never imagine! Feel, process, cry, be sad! It will transform into great joy and learning! I promise that! This I have experienced and am much lighter for it!


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As I take all my talents and decipher them into how to share the joy vibe with others, I realize all healing, health, life energy, vitality,  shakti, bioenergy, whatever you want to call it is about play! Oxytocin, seratonin, dopamine or the parasympathetic nervous system, energy medicine, miracle healing  is about having more joy and pleasure in life! This creates the right energy, chemical reactions in your body that lead to health.

To play we must be present, doing what we are doing, in joy, giggling, laughter. This youthful art is what destresses, and heals the system to create vitality or life energy. We could go through the science, the details, the studies, the blah blah, I study it all. No matter how you cut it, it is about being in the feel good chemicals as much as you can in a day that it becomes a healing habit. Then the body repairs and corrects itself. Currently we are in the fight or flight cortisol habit.

If we lighten up, play, mess around, we get greater health and rejuvenation! This is so incredibly easy and fun! We could eat this and that, take these things, move this way or that, they all help but all this falls into place when we have more play, more present moments being in the body in fun not stress. It is that simple. You can take whatever path to play and lightness you want. There are no rules as to what makes you  feel nourished, filled, light, relaxed, open and playing.

This is such good news to me and I find it easy to work this health system. I just have to gather many ways  that get me into a youthful, playful, energy every day. Then I will find more joy, abundance and brightness in each day thus a happier, healthier life. I connect with my body vessel in pleasure, in fun, in relax and it's innate health system kicks in to let me ride in vitality.   We  train ourselves to relax and play rather than be serious about everything. The seriousness is what is creating the stress thus cortisol. We are so hard on ourselves and play is just the opposite. It is light on us.

As  I am rebirthing through this cycle from flower farmer to health and beauty coach, writer and speaker, i realize it is all about Play!  Sharing this with others and giving them awareness on how that energy feels in the body, is the way to add healing to the world and individuals. I can teach others what the vibe of the body is when they are in this healing nervous system. Once you understand this "feeling" of the body and really sink into it and know its nuances, they can reproduce this easily.  You can  create it in all ways throughout a stressful day with what inspires you.

In essence I am like a play therapist.  I like this new direction  explaining the energy medicine I learned. It all boils down to play and pleasure. Whatever your dis-ease, you can cure it through less stress and more play! To be more healthy and beautiful, glowing in vitality, play until you feel an oxytocin vibe and your body will find its healing!

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